i’d like a breakdown from shitler of the different ways my 3%’er status can go up. like does it go up a half percent if i actually do a load of laundry when i say will? or maybe a whole percent if stop saying that i’ll clean my car like i’ve been saying for the last month? because maybe i should actually get like a big bump in percentage for following through on major things.
so remember this?
well, i signed up for one. and i ran almost every single day. and then my gym closed for a week and i totally used that as an excuse to be an even lazier piece of shit than i normally am and didn’t run the entire week leading up to the race and instead just ate everything i looked at and laid on the couch.
so then it was the night before the race and shitler was heading out of town and he wished me good luck and i gave him a look. and it must be my typical “i’m pretty positive i’m not going to follow through on what i said i’m going to do” look.
because i was almost positive i was going to bail on it. why?
i didn’t feel ready.
i was convinced i was going to come in dead last.
i was beyond self-conscious.
i had never done one before.
i didn’t think i would make it through.
i hadn’t run on anything besides a treadmill for the last eight weeks.
i didn’t want to run it with anyone knew i knew because i would rather fail miserably in front of strangers.
and shitler was not happy.
because i was really living up to my 3%’er status.
but i woke up the next morning.
and decided – fuck it.
so i ran it.
and i’ll be honest.
the only enjoyment i took from this was when it was fucking over.
but i did it.
so i think i should get 2% for that. because this was kind of major.
at least for me it was.
and just so we’re clear – i feel like i got hit by a mack truck. shin splints, back ache, sore feet.
but eating an entire pizza the day after certainly helped.
and i might consider doing another one if it means i get an entire pizza to myself afterwards.