if anyone wondered how long it took me to get to the gym from my place of employment, don’t worry, i timed myself today. it takes me 3 1/3 “call me maybe” songs.
also, this happened today:
me: uhhh. i got to work and realized i forgot to put on underwear. so shitler has agreed to bring me a pair later.
b: what a sweetheart. who forgets underwear?
me: sometimes i get confused in the morning.
b: it would appear so.
me: i just want some underpants before i go to the gym. i’m worried i’ll chafe without them.
b: nobody likes chafing.
**five hours later**
me: i just got my underwear.
b: wow. did he have to make it for you first?
me: i could only imagine if i got a pair he made. it would be constructed out of some sort of burlap.
me: also, he pulled up in visitor parking which faces right into the conference room. and instead of just handing me the underwear like a normal person he insisted on whipping them around in the air like some sort of lasso. mind you – there was a meeting going on in the conference room at the time. so i can only assume they were all privy to the show.
b: well, at least they had an entertaining meeting.
i picture this is how murphy lee would look reminding me to put some damn underwear on in the morning: